A couple of weeks ago I took advantage of a rare occurrence – great weather in Rochester in the month of May. I put on my workout gear, laced up my sneakers and hit the pavement. I do a combination power walk/jog throughout my northeast neighborhood some evenings. Too often the gift of gab interferes with my workout, and I stop to chat with neighbors, friends and strangers. I give health and wellness advice – wanted or unwanted. Many times people stop me, to encourage me to keep up the good work.
On this sun shiny evening, I was getting it in. I had picked up some speed was finally in the fat burning zone. I jogged past a young man no more than 10 years of age. He yelled out to me, “Hey lady, are you on probation?” I was puzzled by this question, as I couldn’t think of why he would ask me such a thing. I gave myself a once-over to see if anything in my appearance seemed alarming or probation-ish. Finally it hit me, the kid thought I was running from the police.
As I continued with my workout, I came across some friends of my late father. I stopped to chat again. As we were reminiscing, another man joined in the conversation, alerting everyone that I was the police. Despite my denial of a career in law enforcement he insistently stated, “Don’t be fooled by her looks. She is the police. I’m telling you, she is the police because don’t nobody exercise in this neighborhood!”
In 1971 Marvin Gaye released the song “What’s Going On.” This social commentary ballot inspired by the Vietnam War included the lyrics,
“Mother, mother there’s too many of you crying,
Brother, brother, brother there’s far too many of us dying,
We’ve got to find a way to bring some understanding here today.
Come on talk to me, so you can see what’s going on.”
Forty years later Americans cannot wave the flag of victory on our deadliest war ever, OBESITY. The ill effects of poor eating habits and lack of exercise have mothers still crying and brothers still dying. What’s going on in the streets Rochester that exercise has become so foreign that yours truly is thought to be on probation, and accused of being the police for simply power walking and jogging? If nobody is exercising in your neighborhood, Ladies, Gents and Janet Jackson wannabes, will you?
How many times have you heard sayings such as, “What’s in it for me?” or “What have you done for me lately?” I even have “GIVEMEME” on my license plate. For me, it means give me only what I deserve. However, many people have interpreted it as a badge of selfishness.
Over the past few months I have not been feeling well. Exhaustion had me jacked up physically and mentally. I’d come to realize that I’ve been living in survival mode. For years, I’ve been working sixty plus hours a week to clean up some poor financial decisions and to finance my daughter’s college education. She graduated, but that Parent Plus College Loan has eternal life. I’m going to update my will and leave the outstanding balance to my ex-husband.
I went through a very bitter divorce, the loss of both of my parents, and the death my precious catVernonwithin three years. I finally decided to stop looking for the man in the red car that hit my cat. I’m sure that he couldn’t have known that he killed a small part of me when he tookVernon’s life and kept going. It was an accident. Had he stopped, I would have tearfully accepted an apology. I know that he kept going because he was more worried about himself than a silly cat, or even the person that loved him most, me.
In my life’s journey I’ve always had a drive for excellence. I have high standards and I strive to be the best at everything I do at all times. It is not uncommon to see me grocery shopping in a dress and heels. I don’t go anywhere without my Mary Kay, including the Y. Recently my family members have shared with me that my unrealistic standards and drive for excellence has often left them feeling inadequate or unable to measure up. Because I was so focused on self-actualization, obtaining more education, earning more money and getting a better body, I didn’t acknowledge their pain. I just kept driving.
I’m so thankful that they loved me enough to tell me that I needed to change. Today I’m in a much better place spiritually, mentally and physically. I still have my goals, but they are much more considerate of others. Ladies, Gents and Janet Jackson Wannabes, as they say, “do you” but please consider others while on the road.
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