Theresa’s Take – “Take 4”

Thanksgiving is less than a week away, and you are probably wondering what a Recovering Buffet Queen eats on National All You Can Eat Day. Keep in mind that buffet lovers think in volume, worst case scenarios and collateral damage. The absolute worst I could do on any given day would be would be to consume a Big Mac every hour, on the hour for 24 hours straight, equating to 312 Weight Watchers points, 12,960 calories, or a 4 pound gain of two all beef patties special sauce, lettuce, cheese on a sesame seed bun, with a super sized order of Gas-X on the side. Since I won’t even come close to eating that much, I’ll be ok. The beauty of Weight Watchers is that I can eat whatever what I want in moderation.

Thanksgiving is a day that I enjoy with my family and friends.  Dinner follows the Annual Turkey Bowl, where the men and boys in the family play football. The women and girls do the cooking and praying that dinner is not delayed by the usual trip the emergency room for one of my brothers who keeps forgetting that his body and mind has not come to a consensus on his current football abilities. We will serve the traditional food, plus all the family favorites, turkey & dressing, collard greens with smoked neck bones, ham, yams, chitterlings, macaroni & cheese, raccoon with sweet potatoes, potato salad, rice and gravy, jelly cake, lemon pound cake and sweet potato pie.  My nephew Germaine always wants fried chicken, my other nephew, Dontae has once again requested BBQ ribs, so while my daughter and you all are basting Turkeys in the kitchen, I will be outside grilling my BBQ ribs that taste so good you want to eat the bones.

Yes, I’m going to exercise. The YMCA will be open from 8am-12 noon, offering a variety of  classes. I’ve tried them all. Boot Camp was a little intimidating at first. Anja the Instructor sports black army boots, tattoos and a buzz cut.  She puts us “recruits” at ease with her big smile, followed by a kick-butt workout. She teaches this crawling through the jungle move called the inchworm.  Zumba is a whole lot of fun. I just love a workout that let’s you get your grove on. Girls bring your curling iron, because your curls will “zoom bye bye!” The jury is still out on Active Yoga. My legs were not meant to rest on the back of my elbows upside down. Who knew riding a bike with no destination could be so energizing until I tried Cycle Reebok.  Pilates is my all time favorite. The camaraderie of the dawn patrol is unreal.  This crowd comes to Pilates at 6:15am three times a week, and they are sane!

Ladies, Gents and Janet Jackson Wannabes, it is only one day. No matter how good, bad or downright dreadful you rate your caloric intake; it will be over in exactly 24 hours, giving you and me a fresh start. Instead of fretting about food, enjoy yourself and be thankful for who you are and what you have. Happy Thanksgiving!

Theresa’s Take – “The Third Take”

There I was standing in front of the mirror in the weight room, “Lift your arms straight up,” were Brian’s instructions as he was guiding me through an overhead dumbbell press. Suddenly, a wave of fear came over me, as I could not remember when I had last shaved my armpits. I was thinking to myself, “I’m going to be so ashamed when these arms reach full extension and an afro is staring back at me!”  I sighed with relief when I saw only peach fuzz. It’s funny that no matter how much we try to convince ourselves that we exercise and make better food choices just to benefit our health, we must admit that there is a bit of vanity in our actions.  In general, we desire to find pleasure in our reflection in the mirror.

This armpit scare was not my first odd encounter with the mirror. As most of you have gathered by now, I’ve spent over 2/3 of my life obese. During those years I didn’t spend much time looking in the mirror. I knew I was fat, my friends knew , in fact until I reached  age 30 my dear Grandmother  tried to convenience me  that It was just baby fat, and that I would someday magically loose the weight. Society had confirmed that there was something extra about my being with the repetitive alphabet encoded on my clothing. There were the XXX on my t-shirts, the DDD on my brassieres, and the Queen+ on my hosiery. Needless to say I needed no further validation from the mirror.

Once I began to lose weight, and build confidence with my appearance, I became more comfortable with the mirror. One day at work, I was checking out my reflection in the mirror, when I noticed my collar bone for the first time in many years. I’ve studied anatomy, so I know that there are 206 bones in the human body. Nevertheless I did a double take, because I had not seen any of my bones in quite some time. They were all covered in soul food-nourished flesh. I touched the bone, and did what any rational professional that just made a major discovery would do. I ran through out my workplace, alerting anyone within a two-mile radius that I now have visible bones. Weight Watchers would define this bone finding as a non-scale victory.

 My Grandmother is now 93 years old and has Alzheimer’s disease. The disease has stolen her short term memory, so she often doesn’t recognize the new thinner, fit Theresa.  You may find this hard to believe, but when I’m with her I yearn for my old reflection in the mirror, boneless and 75 pounds heavier, to simply share a moment with the woman who fed and nurtured me with love.

Until next time, Ladies, Gents, and Janet Jackson wannabes, if you are not satisfied with your reflection in the mirror, consider personal training at the YMCA.  Now is the time to make that change!